Called to Power

Something that used to weigh heavily on me and is again hitting me is the unfortunate reality that power attracts different kinds of people. And quite often, it is the least honorable kind. People who are mostly driven by their ego, with little to no regard for others. Just out for themselves, their greed, their vanity, and their pride. Possibly their stifling and overcontroling ways, too. And this isn't new, it's part of life and what people are like. But it can be discouraging to think about or be acutely aware of if you care about the world or just would rather not live in a horrible one. And it is especially ironic that many of the healthiest people are not as compelled to gain power to the same degree. So that pretty much leaves us with a bunch of sick people with a lot of power.

That's why I exhort you, that if you have a good heart and your head is in the right place, do not sleep on your power. In whatever form is meant for you. Because then there won't be enough people to stand against those who'd do awful things with it. Seek to have and maintain power. As much as you can drive yourself to without going mad.

You may have been conditioned to believe power-seeking is in itself bad or sinful, but that's an inaccurate conclusion reached through a lack of nuance. It is the power-hungry bastards that have made it look so, but it is not always the case. You may have even heard that it corrupts people, but that's not necessarily so either. It corrupts you if you let it or if you were already corrupt to begin with and it allows you to enact more of that. And even if you don't fully believe all this, it may still be internalized to the extent that it is holding you back. So you must deprogram and reprogram yourself to view it differently, allowing yourself to be more drawn to it.

And for what it's worth, you are not alone. You may have been born or stumbled upon a series of terrible or questionable people. But if you look closely or elsewhere, you will find that there are still many who are genuinely concerned with bettering themselves and bettering the world. And no, not just for show. Injustice and suffering are truly upsetting to them and move them into corrective and constructive action.  

I am crippled in the sense that there is only so much that I can take on before becoming physically ill, but I can assure you that I do as much as I can with what I recognize to be my particular gifts. You could go through periods when you're searching for what yours are, periods when you're developing them, and periods when you're putting them into use. Might have periods when they overlap too. But there's a high chance that there's something significant that you can do, big or small, that helps keep reality from becoming an unbearable nightmare.