Managing Expectations to Reduce Stress and Overwhelm

Alright, so there’s a lot of work. And probably, you’d like to succeed at delivering something outstanding. Which I would applaud. But are you getting in your own way of it?

Being in a state of relaxation doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re being careless about what you’re doing or supposed to be doing. You may assume that restlessness, in contrast, shows care. And often it does. But more likely than not, it just comes with stress and overwhelm. And while they can push you, they can also pull you back - or cause you to trip over your own feet.

Take a deep breath and slowly let it out. You got this. Instead, reevaluate. 

What are your expectations?

You can aim as high as you wish. I’m not here to tell you to be “realistic”. Just as long as you can also make peace with hitting below it if it comes to be, it’ll be fine. Being ambitious isn’t torturous in itself. It is only the fear of not meeting your aspirations and not being prepared to fail that can mess you up and crush you. Or even worse, keep you reducing your expectations so you accomplish what you set out to but not deliver much or anything beyond it.

What are your standards?

You can take an honest look at the quality you are able to deliver and nudge yourself a bit above it with every new task or whenever you can afford to do that (having the required time, energy, resources). You can go from a 10 to a 100, but it might be more practical for you to allow yourself a more gradual improvement. That way, you won’t be crippled by perfectionism and end up putting off or forever holding onto it.

What are your approaches?

If you’re a mathematical and strategic genius, you could come up with systems and processes that make the most and the best of what you’ve got to deliver flawless results at a low cost and in a short amount of time. But maybe you’re not and that is fine. What you do then, is apply approaches that seem suitable and, through trial and error, optimize as you see fit while you keep going.

A useful trick that is worth emphasizing is to attempt what is called a Minimum Viable Product first. Once you have that, you can relax by knowing that at least something that is sufficient has been done and is in your hands. From there, you can put more into it with what you’ve got left. This is especially handy when you’re in days when you’re not and cannot give your best. But instead of letting it discourage or even paralyze you, you manage.

Furthermore, don’t overlook the convenience of organizational tools! Breaking down unclear goals into clear steps can free you from much stress and overwhelm. 

CREDIT: AI-Generated Examples done on Leonardo.AI

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Herd Mentality, AVOID

If you see through and are not drawn to adopt herd mentality, you should probably stay away from people who adamantly do.

People without vision, empathy, or any desire to stand out beyond having, maintaining, or reaching a higher social status will continually chip at your self-esteem, making you feel inadequate. They may argue that they have "social skills" better than yours and that, therefore, they know best how to behave. When the reality may be closer to that of them being false, manipulative, and willing to do whatever it takes for the image they believe is appropriate to have. If not just so overly concerned about it that it'll rule you too.

If that's something you can and wish to live with, then fine. My site is not for you. But if you know that you gain the most success AND fulfillment by staying lucid and making bold moves, then please don't give into that.

Actually, Women Can

Never in my life have I doubted women’s capabilities on the basis of them being women. Not even when I could doubt my own.

Maybe the set of circumstances I was born into and raised with has A LOT to do with it, but I don’t believe they’re necessary to be able to see how amazingly competent many women can be. If you’re cherry-picking the shallowest ones and/or ignoring what’s in front of you to make a point, that’s on you.

Mingling with Peers and Finding your Clique

Can’t be a loner forever, or can you? There is a point to interacting and exchanging with others. Or several ones, actually. Burdensome as it may sometimes seem or be.

You get to share experiences and what comes out of them. You gain perspective and expand your horizons. You may split the load and tackle more together. You might even be able to rely on each other and have each other’s backs. You could get support and assistance. Along with understanding, affirmation, and a sense of belonging. Or at least that’s the case when it goes well.

But although we’re all human beings, we have both similarities and differences, and that can get tricky. We may be intrigued and fascinated by what is different, as it leads us to discover and incorporate more. And we may be sticking to what’s similar, as it allows us to simply be without much explanation or justification. And we may be drawn to a bit of both. Alternatively, though, we may instead be repelled by them. To differences because they are disturbing or even disruptive (valid or not), and to similarities because we seek novelty instead of familiarity or do not quite accept and value ourselves and what’s reflected back to us. That and more reasons under or around these.

Whatever may be, it’ll do you wonders to finally click with others. You may find it invigorating or simply reassuring. And while it may not cure everything, it could have an effect on your anxiety and depression, if you suffer from any of those. Because whether we like to admit it or not, and regardless of the extent, we’re meant to have some form of company. And as long as it is for mutual benefit, not much can go wrong that can’t be fixed.

Many of the problems arise when people connect (or, well, “connect”) with others only for shallow and/or egotistical reasons. They don’t care about you as a human being, they care about what you can do for them and their status. And that’s something to watch out for if you’re a genuine person looking for genuine interactions.

If networking is what you’re after, void of any “sentimentality”, then you can very well do that with others who are also after the same. In which case, whether you must be fake polite or rudely blunt to further your agenda is for you to figure out. But don’t bring that nonsense where authentic and solidary relationships are preferred.

Cultures and subcultures change with the years, but they’re generally the same in that they form groups and subgroups. The latter usually displaying what sets them apart, so it is not impossible to notice how relatable they could be to you and whether or not you could identify with them. Always beware of the posers, though!

CREDIT: AI-Generated Examples done on Leonardo.AI

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Libra's Description

♎ LIBRA

Libra, the seventh sign, is an air and cardinal sign, representing balance and harmony. Known for its diplomacy and charm, it is able to bring reconciliation and cooperation in relationships (between people and more). Often associated with beauty and grace, it takes notice of aesthetics and composition. Furthermore, the ability to see and weigh both sides of a situation allows mediation with ease. The scales point to its quest for symmetry and proportion. And beneath this lies a serious sense of justice and fairness.

Spiritually, Libra takes us into the complexities of relationships and partnerships. It teaches us the importance of cooperation and compromise, along with respect for equilibrium.

For context and more of relevance, please read about The Zodiac.

You Can Say No

Remember, everyone...
You can say No and still be a good person.
You can help others out without destroying yourself.
You can prioritize yourself and those closest to you while also extending a hand to your neighbors.
You can be selective about who you let into your life.

Compassion is good, but so are boundaries.
You cannot give from an empty or broken cup.

10 Things that Make You Become or Remain Dumb

More likely than not, you don’t want to be or stay too dumb. At least not awfully so. Sure, ignorance is bliss and curiosity killed the cat, and we might spiral down if we go down too many rabbit holes to get to the bottom and leave no stone unturned, but you could do with being a bit smart or smarter than you are.

Especially nowadays, when information sharing, in various forms, has become what positions you among the rest. And it’s as if everyone is eager to have a stance on whatever the current topics are. And even when they aren’t, they might be pressured to (not that you always have to give in, but it can put you against the wall). Furthermore, though not new, too many people go around taking advantage of whoever they can by being “clever” and trying to outsmart them - employing tactics and maneuvering in ways that you could miss.

So what can you do to get out of your ignorance and proceed further toward awareness? Catch yourself whenever you’re doing or about to do any of the following and instead keep yourself from them.

• Never asking questions, too afraid to appear uninformed.

• Being too stubborn with what you believe or not stubborn enough.

• Indulging in wishful thinking or being consumed by fearful thinking.

• Overelying on whether or not the information comes from what are considered “reliable sources” rather than practicing discernment.

• Accepting views and opinions as facts based on whether they are popular or unpopular takes.

• Persisting in echo chambers or concentrating on devil advocates.

• Refusing to consider hypotheses and theories that haven’t been sufficiently proven (assuming that proven = true and unproven = false, or a complete dismissal of fiction).

• Alternatively, refusing to ever reach any firm conclusion because you do not know what you do not know.

• Blind faith in what has been already established, as if it is somehow not prone to any error or corruption. 

• Failing to take proper care of yourself (physically and psychologically) and letting your brain functions decline.

Now, which have you fallen into to an extent that has undoubtedly dumbed you down? What else has? How can you start turning it around?

CREDIT: AI-Generated Examples done on Leonardo.AI

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