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Saturday, July 6, 2024

Recognizing Neglect

Recognizing neglect can be not only difficult due to lack of clarity, but also avoided as it entails coming to the realization that you are either being treated poorly or treating another poorly - or both. However, it is still best to get to and have the truth of the situation to better proceed with it.

If you are dependent on another or another is dependent on you, that opens up the possibility of neglect. To what degree, that depends. Is what it is being relied on for common sense or has it been discussed? Even if it is supposed to be common sense, discussing it to be sure is always best. Yes, even to a little child, telling them “I am your parent, that makes me your caregiver, you can (and should) come to me for x, y, and z.” Along with telling them what other adults they can go to for more care. Alternatively, you could ask, if you’re in doubt, about how much you can count on another.

Once there has been direct communication about it, it is easier to spot when and where care, that you’re expected to receive, is lacking. Keeping in mind, however, that a person is not always able to quickly come through, if at all, for you. There may be more that they are juggling that is of the same or more importance or they may be having trouble themselves in some way.

However, if it is someone who has promised you this and that and then some more, causing you to rely on them for such, and they just show you over and over again that you are not a priority and they do not intend to keep their word (just benefited from your dependence on them and what came with it), you’ve got yourself a worthless piece of s***. And maybe they should be in prison along with compensating you with interests. But if walking away is all you can do, then let that be it.

Whether we like it or not, we are part of a collective. A human being on Earth, a peer, a teacher, a class or teammate, a coworker, a boss or an employee or a client, a partner, a parent or a child, an idol, a friend… And we do have the choice to be closely involved with others or not, being transparent about it. But there’s still going to be a bit of responsibility falling upon us regardless. And failing to tend to those or not, makes a difference.

See also: What is neglect?